Originally, I thought I would write a blog that didn’t have anything to do with baseball. Just something that was about me in all my glorious awesomeness. Ha ha, not really glorious, just regular awesomeness ;-). But I thought after blogging nonstop about baseball, maybe it was time that I write a “normal” blog. One that’s more about me rather than the ramblings about what I think about the Rockies. So I started one, then I published it, then I deleted it. First of all, it was like, the worst thing I’d ever written in my life. My blogs, when I write them, I’m passionate. Can you tell? I hope so, because a lot of thought, thinking, debating goes into my blogs. I write about what I feel about baseball in my blog. I write about my love (or obsession) of a team. The blog that I had written about me, it felt empty. It lacked passion, there was no heart. As I was writing this, I had an epiphany; not that I needed it though, but it was: I can’t live without baseball. I thought I already knew this, my friends always make fun of me and are considering seeking professional help for me. At least, last I knew, it was still only at the “considering” phase.
Back in high school, I was completely obsessed with hockey. It was my life, I knew everything about the Avalanche, and I would never miss a game. After the lockout, there was a void in my life. I never quite got back into hockey, although I’m trying to now. But it just wasn’t the same, plus, I couldn’t get the channel that it was played on. So, there was just this emptiness where I couldn’t devote my fanhood to anything. Then, baseball came along. Contrary to popular belief, I didn’t jump on the Rockies bandwagon once they made it to the NLCS. I was still a Red Sox fan. Now, to anyone out there thinking I am a traitor for being a Red Sox fan, I’ll have you know… that’s ridiculous. I was indifferent when it came to the World Series. It would have been so freaking amazing to see the Rockies win for the first time, but if the Red Sox were to win, I wouldn’t complain. In fact, there wouldn’t even be this “rivalry” had neither team made it to the World Series, so technically, my belief stems from this idea that there isn’t a rivalry at all. People just hate Boston and call them the new Yankees, which they are NOT. But that’s a different tangent that I shouldn’t go on about.
The point was this, I can’t live without this sport, this past time, whatever you want to call it. It’s what I breathe. I’m now searching for a job in sports psychology, my dream: working for the Rockies. I can picture some cynical person trying to make a snide comment like, “why not go work for your precious Red Sox?” Well, the fact is, they’re not in need of it. And this isn’t supposed to come off like, “Oh the Rockies are so terrible, they obviously need my help.” Right now, I’m interning at a domestic violence safe house. My goal in life is to help people achieve their very best, it’s what I want: to see other people succeed. I would love nothing more than to see the Rockies succeed and I want to be part of the reason they do. Even Ted Williams, one of the greatest hitters of all time (and yes, he’s a Red Sox player) said that 50% of hitting is above the shoulders. That means it’s mental. You couldn’t ask me about any time when Ted Williams played, by the way, I wouldn’t know… something like the… 30’s…? That’s a guess. Anyway, I have a lot of respect for the guy, is the point. One of the best of the best, in fact, someone who is considered the best of all time, will (or would have, he’s dead now) tell you that at least part of the game is mental. That is why I want to be a sports psychologist. To help people become the best of the best.
I’m in the computer lab at my school, and I’m hearing people talk about being a school psychologist. I believe that’s all well and good, and I could devote my time to something like that… that is, if I actually knew what to do with children. But as I said before, I can’t live without this. I can’t go a day without thinking about baseball, without wondering how that California weather is treating Garrett Atkins, without wondering if Ryan Spilborghs is worried about playing Left Field, without pondering if Huston Street is preparing for the challenge of fighting for closer. Yeah, these are things I think about. This is what I breathe, it’s what I live for, it’s what I do. There’s nothing in this life that I think about more than baseball… school comes close though… er… sort of. But I know, for certain, this is what I’m destined for.
Now, this, this blog, that actually has passion in it, but also tells you about me, this is worth publishing.